Relationship With Yourself
It’s important to have healthy relationships with the people around us. But what is most important is to have a healthy relationship with yourself.
Louise Hay taught me a great technique called Mirror Work. Louise Hay is a best selling author of You Can Heal Your Life and she is the founder of the Hay House, where you can find a lot extraordinary information.
Mirror Work is one of the easiest and accessible way to develop a healthy relationship with yourself.
Mirror Work
Mirror work is a simple technique that anyone can learn. Just take a mirror, even a small pocket mirror. Look yourself in the eyes and talk to those eyes, as if they were your best friend.
Before learning about the mirror work, I would only look at the exterior while preparing myself. I would dress up, put my makeup on, comb my hair and get ready to work. All I cared about was to be more presentable to the people around me. How my hair looked and if the make-up was OK.
When I heard about mirror work the first time, I realized that even though I was standing in front of the mirror for 5-10 minutes while I was getting ready, I never actually looked myself in the eyes for even ONE second! And I had never realized that before. I looked at the person in the mirror, but I did not actually SEE the myself. Can you believe that?!
I did not take the time to see me!
When I started using this technique I was not good at it at all. It needed courage to look in that mirror and look into those eyes. It took quite some time before I managed to work up the courage to look myself in the eyes. I had to start with baby-steps; a little peak here, a couple of seconds there…. until I had the courage to talk to the person in the mirror. I said “Monica”…. The first times around that was all I managed. After some times I was able to hold the connection for a bit longer and I was able to continue the conversation a bit longer. “Monica, how are you?”. A couple of days later I managed to say: “Monica, you look great today!”
Here are some ideas on what you can say to yourself:
You can start out with “I am willing to love and accept you, just the way you are.”. “I am willing to feel good about you” “I am willing to love you, just the way you are”. After some time you will be able to look yourself in the eyes and say (with feelings) “I love and accept you, just the way you are”
Be prepared! When you do this the first times, you will feel all the negative judgments you have about yourself come up in your mind
Why use this technique?
What you do when you talk to yourself in the mirror, is that you connect to the child within. Your child within needs to be loved, to be comforted and seen not just by others, but most importantly by yourself. So, give yourself time next time you stand in front of a mirror. Look yourself in the eyes and show appreciation for what you see. Learn to see your soul. Learn to see and appreciate your child within. Learn to appreciate yourself. Learn to approve of yourself. Learn to develop a relationship with who you really are.
With mirror work you learn to love yourself at the soul level.
It is extremely important to feel good about yourself. You are actually the most important person in your life. And if you have a hard time achieving your goals, it’s because you are not accepting and loving yourself at the soul level. So, find yourself a beautiful mirror, perhaps a heart-shaped mirror, and use it every day. It might be a bit hard in the beginning, but you will not regret it.
My special little trick...
I found that looking at myself in a big mirror made it all very difficult in the beginning. So i started using a pocket-mirror. You know, one of those pocket-mirrors we women use for make-up. That way all I could only see my eyes. It made it possible for me to focus better and it made it less threatening. I also found that it made it easier to get to know the person within when I had only the eyes to focus on. Try it out yourself!
Start a healthy relationship with yourself today – Look yourself in the eyes ...with love.
